Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly ?

Rain Sun

Between Rain and sun
I got your seduction.
Between cold and warm
Your driving my emotion.
It is that love that I get
Always changes color.
It is that love that I get,
or if it is love.

Offering trnuras
nustro what I would argue.
Your eyes but tell me
that none of this is going to stay.
Again you off
looking for something away from me.
My being here on this soil.
Then you say you wanted to go back?
Tell me then where I am?

Rain - and I can not anymore.

(Art graciously presented by Audrey Kawasaki)

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Now playing: Les Babacools - Lluvia Sol
via FoxyTunes

Pies, ¿qué te necesito para cuando tengo alas para volar?

Lluvia Sol

Entre la Lluvia y el sol
me tienes con tu seduccion.
Entre frio y calor
manejas tu mi emocion.
Es que el amor que me das
siempe cambia de color.
Es que el amor que me das,
pues ni se si es amor.

Ofreciendome trnuras
lo nustro quisiera sostener.
Tus ojos pero me cuentan
que nada de esto va a permanecer.
De nuevo te apartas
buscando algo bien lejos de mi.
Mi ser esta aqui en el suelo.
Luego me dices que quisieras volver?
Dime pues donde estoy?

Lluvi - ya no puedo mas.

(Art graciously presented by Audrey Kawasaki)
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Now playing: Les Babacools - Lluvia Sol
via FoxyTunes

another bullshit night in suck city

You ever hang out with someone and realize after multiple encounters that you really don;t like that person ? Like it takes you a few tries and you want to work it out cause you have mutual friends in common ? That's how I feel about "liz" [names have been changed to protect the innocent and the fuck ups].

I have known this girl since she came to school and I tried to be cool with her since she is like one of 20 minorities on campus (exaggeration but not by much). And I brought her into the fold of the "Anime Club" and over the years I took her to house parties and such so she could go out and drink. Cool older guy right? Nope!

In all these years she only invited me out to one house party. We get there and someone is Blackface dressed as Turk from Scrubs. Word? And oh, the keg is kicked and there is no liquor anywhere. Cool. I'm pissy but can;t blame anyone. Not her fault. Then she proceeds to drop hints about coming to my house.

I was like, I didn;t invite you. You didn;t even ask. You can;t invite yourself over. Then she's asking ME if I have have liquor at my house? First, no I don;t. Second, I'm not a store you can just drink from. But she didn;t even let it go. She goes on about how she knows I have some and I just don;t want to give her any. Well if I did, do something about it. With that attitude why should I ? So I just go home. Alone.

Last night. Haven;t hung out in a while. (See above incident). We're hanging out at a bar. I haven't gone out in a long time. I'm chilling. We all buy a few drinks, but after awile funds are getting lower for everyone. I'm about to get up and get one of the last ones......"can I borrow some money?" What? No.

I told her how much I make anyway. I'm always poor. For real. She has a job. And makes more than me I;m sure if not the same, part time. And she lives on campus. No expenses. Anyway, if you don;t have the funds stay home like I do, or sip on shit slowly. Then she goes on about how I love her and we're friends and that's why I should let her borrow some dough. Wtf.

And then she asks everyone else. Oh I'll pay you back tomorrow blah blah etc.
Mind you, the drinks she did get, she didn;t tip. I saw the shit. Didn;t even leave the change. Quarters. I'm sure the bartender would understand and appreciate the gesture.

FINALLY she gets the last 2 bucks from our friend and comes up to the bar with me. "What can I get with 2 dollars" A beer says the bartender. Anything hard alcohol? Uhhhh... no sorry. You sure? Uhhh yea. There's nothing in this establishment that I can get for 2 dollars that isn't beer ? etc. And so on. I'm just like, it's a full bar if he says that's it then that's it. Suck it up. You don;t like beer? Beggers and choosers. Sucks.
Then she asks me if she should give him the 2 bucks to make up for not tipping. I;m like well you didn;t tip but I don;t want to tell you what to do with that guy's money. She tips. I feel better.

Then I ask the bartender to make me something that is strong but tastey. He makes up some shenanigan and I come back to the table. Everyone wants to try it. Oh wait not just try it cause it's delicious in one sip. They want to drink some in turns. Wtf? "Carlos" fine I guess I owe you 5 bucks for not charging me for that keg party. (Even though now that I think about it...no one was charged like they should have been) So I buy another one.....he can have some. One other girl is trying to get over a break up.....she can have some....and she's hot....(pigish).

Liz.....why the fuck should you have some? And not helping, she was being a bitch trying to tell me and "Carlos" what to do and shit and being annoying. The other girl invited him to sleep over her house. He was like I don;t know, she keeps asking he's like fine. Liz says no.

Yo, who the fuck was talking to you ? Not even like that would be a bad idea for these reasons. Just no. Fuck what? He's not trying to fuck him. She already told us that night how she doesn;t consider him attractive. He doesn;t want to try anything. She was jealous. Cause I know if I invited her over my house (she'd prob ask for drinks) she'd run on over. I think that'd be a bad idea.

Her friend threw up when we went to her house and "liz" is like I think you guys should go so this girl can get some sleep. We're looking after her trying to clean up puke. Chill out. She's still awake. Jealous.

And that's why when she asked why I hadn't friended her on facebook I acted surprised.

That shit's never happening

dark nights

(picture again courtesy of James Jean of Fables)
Money doesn't buy happiness, sure. But it gets rid of a bunch of "being broke" problems. I don;t think I've ever been penniless for so long in my life. And it's not like just not having money and being able to ask your parents for money later. There is no safety net, or someone else to ask about it. Just you. (or me in this case).

I've been pretty lucky that I'm at Feinstein in a way. They're always ordering food. And I am there to take the left overs. There are usually plenty of left overs. And recently there have been a bunch of events. So I've been able to eat by the food I've taken myself mainly. If there wasn;t that. Who knows. My roomates share all the food. But it would just look bad, me eating everything and bringing nothing to the party per say. Oh and I haven't been able to pay rent because of dipshit sovereign bank and fucking americorp.

Not being able to go out in any real way sucks. A lot. What 20-something doesn't go out? All week? Especially on the weekends ? Unheard of. And damn painful. Working this shitty job is bad enough. Then I come home to just sit around. Read a little. Maybe watch the same 20 dvds again. I never thought I'd watch season 1,2, and 5 of the Simpsons. Not that I hate the show. I just don;t watch it that much. But since that's all we have in the house and no cable....it's slim pickings.

Americorp makes me realize how much I depend on money do do things when I want to as opposed to doing things I can do. I never loved money. But now I know that I would prefer to have it. Americorp, I think did the opposite of what it thought it would. Living at the "poverty level" didn't get me closer to the level of the people that I supposed to be serving. It just makes me realize I want to make money enough to make me comfortable. And to think twice before volunteering to do anything; especially long term. This year kind of killed service work for me. What the fuck.

Now it's "Fuck Bitches, Get Money" time.

Grimey.

On the Skids

(picture courtesy of James Jean for Fables)

For once I'm going to talk about myself for a bit. Blogs are weird enough to be shapeable to fit any purpose. So I can talk about comics every time or I can talk about myself a bit.

I'm working on talking about myself more and more. I don;t really talk to other people about myself because 1. They don;t really care. 2. They usually get lost about what I'm saying or just don't understand at all.
So I prefer to keep the headaches to a minimum and just sort it out myself.

But hey, no one is reading this damn blog on purpose or by accident anyway. So I might as well fire away!

I don't feel comfortable enough to put too much of my own personal life on blast. Girls and such. At least not right now. But I can go over the general landscape.....for someone's edification.

There's not much to report when life sucks. Just really in what ways it sucks.
Life sucks.
A lot.
My horoscope (on facebook, it's 80% of the time pretty much accurate, seriously) says that I should just appreciate friends and feelings and not rely on money to bring me joy. Or some such. Due to a bunch of factors I haven't been paid in a bout a month and change. What the fuck ?

Fuck you sovereign Bank. I said it. Fuck You. The way the market is going you'll be under soon enough. Have a warm time in Hell, fuckers. sovereign basically ended my account for dumbass reasons the day I was getting paid and because of some dumb complicated shit I get fucked out of my money. Fucked up I know. And yes, this is not really the whole story. But shit it's my blog. You want their side go to a sovereign bank blog. (Which I hope crashes, if it exist)
So with no account and hate for sovereign bank I had to go and change my pay method from direct deposit to check being mailed. Oh wait, americorp is a bureaucratic government run program that is full of shit ?! Yes!
I'm now being told that instead of being paid on Thurs like everyone else that I have to wait till next Tues?? Word???

Yet again FUCK AMERICORP.

So basically I'm living with no money for an extended period of time. No money for real. I found a dollar once last week. Spent it getting a coke last night. And the only reason I spent it was to mix some 151 with something. Otherwise I'd have kept it. Being poor sucks something fierce. I don;t mean not having much money most of the time. I mean having no money all the time.

The Land of Tears is very Quiet indeed

Been awhile hasn't it ?

Well it's seems like a lifetime to me. It must seem like a bit of time to you too, imaginary audience. There always seems to be a lull in blogging and then a sudden resurfacing. This is my sudden resurfacing. And none too soon some may say. If you haven't tired of my one rant and my multiple graphic novel reviews, than you're here to stay!! Sit back and relax! Enjoy the show.

"All the world is a stage and we but players on it."