Thursday, September 25, 2008

Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly ?



Rain Sun

Between Rain and sun
I got your seduction.
Between cold and warm
Your driving my emotion.
It is that love that I get
Always changes color.
It is that love that I get,
or if it is love.

Offering trnuras
nustro what I would argue.
Your eyes but tell me
that none of this is going to stay.
Again you off
looking for something away from me.
My being here on this soil.
Then you say you wanted to go back?
Tell me then where I am?

Rain - and I can not anymore.

(Art graciously presented by Audrey Kawasaki)

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Now playing: Les Babacools - Lluvia Sol
via FoxyTunes

Pies, ¿qué te necesito para cuando tengo alas para volar?





Lluvia Sol

Entre la Lluvia y el sol
me tienes con tu seduccion.
Entre frio y calor
manejas tu mi emocion.
Es que el amor que me das
siempe cambia de color.
Es que el amor que me das,
pues ni se si es amor.

Ofreciendome trnuras
lo nustro quisiera sostener.
Tus ojos pero me cuentan
que nada de esto va a permanecer.
De nuevo te apartas
buscando algo bien lejos de mi.
Mi ser esta aqui en el suelo.
Luego me dices que quisieras volver?
Dime pues donde estoy?

Lluvi - ya no puedo mas.

(Art graciously presented by Audrey Kawasaki)
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Now playing: Les Babacools - Lluvia Sol
via FoxyTunes

another bullshit night in suck city


You ever hang out with someone and realize after multiple encounters that you really don;t like that person ? Like it takes you a few tries and you want to work it out cause you have mutual friends in common ? That's how I feel about "liz" [names have been changed to protect the innocent and the fuck ups].

I have known this girl since she came to school and I tried to be cool with her since she is like one of 20 minorities on campus (exaggeration but not by much). And I brought her into the fold of the "Anime Club" and over the years I took her to house parties and such so she could go out and drink. Cool older guy right? Nope!

In all these years she only invited me out to one house party. We get there and someone is Blackface dressed as Turk from Scrubs. Word? And oh, the keg is kicked and there is no liquor anywhere. Cool. I'm pissy but can;t blame anyone. Not her fault. Then she proceeds to drop hints about coming to my house.

I was like, I didn;t invite you. You didn;t even ask. You can;t invite yourself over. Then she's asking ME if I have have liquor at my house? First, no I don;t. Second, I'm not a store you can just drink from. But she didn;t even let it go. She goes on about how she knows I have some and I just don;t want to give her any. Well if I did, do something about it. With that attitude why should I ? So I just go home. Alone.

Last night. Haven;t hung out in a while. (See above incident). We're hanging out at a bar. I haven't gone out in a long time. I'm chilling. We all buy a few drinks, but after awile funds are getting lower for everyone. I'm about to get up and get one of the last ones......"can I borrow some money?" What? No.

I told her how much I make anyway. I'm always poor. For real. She has a job. And makes more than me I;m sure if not the same, part time. And she lives on campus. No expenses. Anyway, if you don;t have the funds stay home like I do, or sip on shit slowly. Then she goes on about how I love her and we're friends and that's why I should let her borrow some dough. Wtf.

And then she asks everyone else. Oh I'll pay you back tomorrow blah blah etc.
Mind you, the drinks she did get, she didn;t tip. I saw the shit. Didn;t even leave the change. Quarters. I'm sure the bartender would understand and appreciate the gesture.

FINALLY she gets the last 2 bucks from our friend and comes up to the bar with me. "What can I get with 2 dollars" A beer says the bartender. Anything hard alcohol? Uhhhh... no sorry. You sure? Uhhh yea. There's nothing in this establishment that I can get for 2 dollars that isn't beer ? etc. And so on. I'm just like, it's a full bar if he says that's it then that's it. Suck it up. You don;t like beer? Beggers and choosers. Sucks.
Then she asks me if she should give him the 2 bucks to make up for not tipping. I;m like well you didn;t tip but I don;t want to tell you what to do with that guy's money. She tips. I feel better.

Then I ask the bartender to make me something that is strong but tastey. He makes up some shenanigan and I come back to the table. Everyone wants to try it. Oh wait not just try it cause it's delicious in one sip. They want to drink some in turns. Wtf? "Carlos" fine I guess I owe you 5 bucks for not charging me for that keg party. (Even though now that I think about it...no one was charged like they should have been) So I buy another one.....he can have some. One other girl is trying to get over a break up.....she can have some....and she's hot....(pigish).

Liz.....why the fuck should you have some? And not helping, she was being a bitch trying to tell me and "Carlos" what to do and shit and being annoying. The other girl invited him to sleep over her house. He was like I don;t know, she keeps asking he's like fine. Liz says no.

Yo, who the fuck was talking to you ? Not even like that would be a bad idea for these reasons. Just no. Fuck what? He's not trying to fuck him. She already told us that night how she doesn;t consider him attractive. He doesn;t want to try anything. She was jealous. Cause I know if I invited her over my house (she'd prob ask for drinks) she'd run on over. I think that'd be a bad idea.

Her friend threw up when we went to her house and "liz" is like I think you guys should go so this girl can get some sleep. We're looking after her trying to clean up puke. Chill out. She's still awake. Jealous.

And that's why when she asked why I hadn't friended her on facebook I acted surprised.

That shit's never happening

Friday, September 19, 2008

dark nights

(picture again courtesy of James Jean of Fables)
Money doesn't buy happiness, sure. But it gets rid of a bunch of "being broke" problems. I don;t think I've ever been penniless for so long in my life. And it's not like just not having money and being able to ask your parents for money later. There is no safety net, or someone else to ask about it. Just you. (or me in this case).

I've been pretty lucky that I'm at Feinstein in a way. They're always ordering food. And I am there to take the left overs. There are usually plenty of left overs. And recently there have been a bunch of events. So I've been able to eat by the food I've taken myself mainly. If there wasn;t that. Who knows. My roomates share all the food. But it would just look bad, me eating everything and bringing nothing to the party per say. Oh and I haven't been able to pay rent because of dipshit sovereign bank and fucking americorp.

Not being able to go out in any real way sucks. A lot. What 20-something doesn't go out? All week? Especially on the weekends ? Unheard of. And damn painful. Working this shitty job is bad enough. Then I come home to just sit around. Read a little. Maybe watch the same 20 dvds again. I never thought I'd watch season 1,2, and 5 of the Simpsons. Not that I hate the show. I just don;t watch it that much. But since that's all we have in the house and no cable....it's slim pickings.

Americorp makes me realize how much I depend on money do do things when I want to as opposed to doing things I can do. I never loved money. But now I know that I would prefer to have it. Americorp, I think did the opposite of what it thought it would. Living at the "poverty level" didn't get me closer to the level of the people that I supposed to be serving. It just makes me realize I want to make money enough to make me comfortable. And to think twice before volunteering to do anything; especially long term. This year kind of killed service work for me. What the fuck.

Now it's "Fuck Bitches, Get Money" time.

Grimey.

On the Skids

(picture courtesy of James Jean for Fables)

For once I'm going to talk about myself for a bit. Blogs are weird enough to be shapeable to fit any purpose. So I can talk about comics every time or I can talk about myself a bit.

I'm working on talking about myself more and more. I don;t really talk to other people about myself because 1. They don;t really care. 2. They usually get lost about what I'm saying or just don't understand at all.
So I prefer to keep the headaches to a minimum and just sort it out myself.

But hey, no one is reading this damn blog on purpose or by accident anyway. So I might as well fire away!

I don't feel comfortable enough to put too much of my own personal life on blast. Girls and such. At least not right now. But I can go over the general landscape.....for someone's edification.

There's not much to report when life sucks. Just really in what ways it sucks.
Life sucks.
A lot.
My horoscope (on facebook, it's 80% of the time pretty much accurate, seriously) says that I should just appreciate friends and feelings and not rely on money to bring me joy. Or some such. Due to a bunch of factors I haven't been paid in a bout a month and change. What the fuck ?

Fuck you sovereign Bank. I said it. Fuck You. The way the market is going you'll be under soon enough. Have a warm time in Hell, fuckers. sovereign basically ended my account for dumbass reasons the day I was getting paid and because of some dumb complicated shit I get fucked out of my money. Fucked up I know. And yes, this is not really the whole story. But shit it's my blog. You want their side go to a sovereign bank blog. (Which I hope crashes, if it exist)
So with no account and hate for sovereign bank I had to go and change my pay method from direct deposit to check being mailed. Oh wait, americorp is a bureaucratic government run program that is full of shit ?! Yes!
I'm now being told that instead of being paid on Thurs like everyone else that I have to wait till next Tues?? Word???

Yet again FUCK AMERICORP.

So basically I'm living with no money for an extended period of time. No money for real. I found a dollar once last week. Spent it getting a coke last night. And the only reason I spent it was to mix some 151 with something. Otherwise I'd have kept it. Being poor sucks something fierce. I don;t mean not having much money most of the time. I mean having no money all the time.

The Land of Tears is very Quiet indeed


Been awhile hasn't it ?

Well it's seems like a lifetime to me. It must seem like a bit of time to you too, imaginary audience. There always seems to be a lull in blogging and then a sudden resurfacing. This is my sudden resurfacing. And none too soon some may say. If you haven't tired of my one rant and my multiple graphic novel reviews, than you're here to stay!! Sit back and relax! Enjoy the show.

"All the world is a stage and we but players on it."

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Bleed Ink--Life Sucks

Hello ninjas.

This is a recent piece of work that really needs to be read and re-read on repeat. Mainly because this graphic novel covers such topics as: lust, love, inter-racial relationships, loneliness, loyalty, tradition, dis-illusionment of folklore and tradition,West Coast culture, White privilege, class, socio-economics, goth identity, gender issues, and just plain vampires and 20-something angst.

Excited? I know I am.

The location is California.
To be more specific, the 24 hrs. stop shop a la 7-11.
Our pseudo hero Dave is doomed to work at the "Last Stop" of gatorade and slim jims for a seemingly eternity. Literally.

One day stumbling upon the store looking for a job one night Dave got more than he asked for and is now part indentured slave and part real slave to his master Lord Radu Arisztidescu...or just plain Radu.

Radu is the remnants of the European Eastern block before the wall came down. He and men like him don't form the sort of hedonistic, uber-powerful vampire collective you might imagine. They are more so, just eclectic 1st generation immigrants

So what is our hero supposed to do other than obviously fall in love? Worse yet, with a Goth chick. Worse yet, a mortal Goth chick. Worse yet, a Mexican, mortal, Goth chick. Nevermind that Dave has to deal with his White pasty self courting a Woman of Color but he can't tan, or he'll burst into flames.

This graphic novel from First Second Comics
deals ingeniously with the daily troubles of being poorly paid, lonely, and twenty-something in Cali. Dave has to run home after his night shift. He sells an underground blood beer to fellow vampire customers when they come in. He even gets drunk on it after he has too much. This comes about because he's a "vegetarian". He refuses to drink humans dry and so sticks to blood bank bags and vampire beers. The side effect is that he's weaker and sickly compared to most vampires. It only adds to his emo boy appeal though.

Entering the scene, is his archenemy Wes who is the blond, dumb, insecure, and psychotic killer, alpha male Wes, the "blood brother" of Dave. And of course Wes has the immediate hots for Rosa, our Mexican mortal Goth friend. And now the ancient battle to not have your love taken away by a douchebag begins. Who will win? Don't expect the conventional answer from this unconventional story.

Everything about this story is noteworthy to me. The whole thing is about power dynamics. There is the power dynamic between a White 20-something poor male who is trying to create a relationship with a 20-something Mexican female. He's male and she doesn't want him to run her life. While he's trying to protect someone who doesn't necessarily want to be protected. His White-ness and all it's (unwanted, unconsidered) privilege brings another level of barriers that Rosa and Dave have to deal with.

Oh wait you say! Class and socio-economic status are way bigger factors in interactions than simple race and ethnicity. Possibly more so than gender!

Well Wes is a rich, trust fund vampire that doesn't do anything but surf, party, drink blood and kill people at will. He has the hots for Rosa. Kind of like an exotic toy the kid you hate has. He is just exerting his greed into the realm of relationships to push down his working class brother. Rosa isn't a woman he's really interested in, but she is a way to shove Wes' power in Dave face.
(I still find it intriguing that Rosa swears that she sees the sensitive, softer side of Wes that Dave can't see)

Please do yourself a favor and read this graphic novel and look out for more from First Second. They're ill. and From NY. I'll prob go over American Born Chinese (ABC).

And def Shortcomings. GREAT graphic novel that hits close to home.

Peace,
Edmund




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Now playing: Gorillaz - 5/4
via FoxyTunes

Monday, July 7, 2008

Why My Life is Meaningless (cont. from last post)


But even after being so right about the self righteousness about my job I still deserve some of this. I know I have hit rock bottom for many reasons. The main one has to be this: I have applied for jobs in Providence and gotten not one reply of any kind.

Let me explain that these jobs are cool sounding ones posted on Craigslist. But not something that I should be worried about not getting. I am very qualified dammit.

One posting was honest to God, to be a "Porn movie reviewer". I jumped to apply. Have yet to hear a reply. Another one was to be a travel editor/publisher. One had a blog writer position. Etc etc. Basically all the jobs that would fit me to a T....but I still haven;t heard back from any of them. I would be great for these jobs and would love to do any of them. Especially cause I know they'd pay more no matter what they paid I'm sure. I was even hoping to do more than one of them. But nothing.

Honestly. The only interview I've had for the (by now)20-30 jobs I've applied for is Americorp. I must suck so bad and they must be so desperate that they took me. No one else wants/needs me bad enough.

SO that is why I should shut the fuck up and burn my English major, Black/Women Studies minor diploma.

[oh and the image is symbolic not literal. i'm far to vain to kill myself. don't let anyone else tell you otherwise]

Bashing: Americorp VISTA



What's up people.

Or just Heather.

This going to be one of the first blogs on my actual life. SO enjoy the blood spray while you can.
I'm here now to bash the hell out of my job and tell you why.
I'm an Americorp member. This can range from helping people prepare for emergency situations to grantwriting all day everyday. I am somewhere in the middle it seems.

As a VISTA I am supposed to be a person that works on indirect service. I change the system to allow more people to go to college....in theory. That actually has nothing to do with my job. I rarely if ever do work that helps underprivileged students gain access to higher education. But that's supposed to be my job.

Really I just send out a bunch of e-mails to people to try to make this "grassroots" organization work. I pretty much run this group called the Community Congress. It is made up of a bunch of other groups in the neighborhood; the Library Reform Group, Community Development Corp, Smith Hill Lib. , Providence Housing Assoc. reps like that. In theory they are all supposed to work together and make the area better for people...or something.
Fine. Well they suck at working together because they never come to their own damn meetings. There are about 50 groups on the contact list but the highest attendance I've ever seen is 20 people half of which are students from PC. I do all the work doing the agendas and writing up the minutes and everyone else kind of just tries to think of shit.

But I'm not mad about that.

I'm mad cause I'm getting worked like a slave and they keep rubbing that in my face.
This year I had 2 big projects I had to run myself. Community Congress and the Alternative Spring Break. Ok. A lot of work but in theory, do-able.

1)Americorp people are supposed to work for a year. I was hired in Oct. I was supposed to be hired in July with everyone else. I thought I would leave in July with everyone else. Nope. I have to work till Oct. of this year and overlap with all the new people.

2)They are hiring 2 people to do the job I did alone this year. That tells me you really can;t do this job efficiently with just one person, so I've been overworked. Secondly, that means that I have been doing double the work and getting singular pay (believe me it's really like 25% the pay, I'll explain)

3)Providence College is paying for the 2 additional workers this year. While Americorp paid me this year. So basically the college is getting 3 full time workers for pretty much free AND Americorp is getting me for an additional 3 months. SO everyone is getting pretty much extra free labor.

4)I only get paid $383 every two weeks after tax. Or $766 a month. Word. And that's from working from 8.30-4.30 everyday. That's fulltime.
And they expect me there at those times believe it or not...for the most part.

5) Oh did I mention that I'm not allowed to work another job? I am "technically" on call 24/7.

Yea. Now how the hell can I respect an organization that rubs it in my face that their using me? I would drop this job honestly at the drop of a hat. If I could get a job at Borders and a job at another bookstore, as long as I made anywhere over, I would work there. And say fuck this job. I only get 10 sick and vacation days. Fuck them. I'll take more days. Fire me. Who would take over?

And really it's not about the pay. Community Organizing isn;t supposed to be. But I looked up what Community Organizers are supposed to make. They make $31,000-$50,000. Mind you most make $32,000. Insulting. And they keep on insulting me. If only I had anything else....

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Fabio Moon and Gabriel Ba




This is what they really look like....in 3-d. Scary I know. Stick to the drawings guys...and I'm not sure which is which.

NEXT TIME! : Reviewing of some graphic novels that would be good for a classroom. There are a lot, depending on the age group, purpose, lesson, ethnic background of the students, etc. But all will be revealed in time.....
Blogged with the Flock Browser

Monday, April 14, 2008

Bleed Ink--De: Tales, Tales from Urban Brazil


Peace Space Cowboys,

Another installment of Bleed Ink here. I have been meaning to post a lot sooner, but you know what husslin' is like. I'm always trying to stay one step ahead of the "man". Sometimes even 5 steps. But on to the review.

If you read the previous installment you know that Gabriel Moon did the artwork for The Umbrella Academy.

Well in this lesser known work, Moon and Ba are working together. Not surprising. They're brothers.

This piece of work really lets the artistry speak for itself, in very striking, subtle, ways. It is very surprising that two brothers can work so well together. Some brother can;t even be in the same car together. These guys try to outdo each other story to story panel to panel.

All of the stories have the back drop of Brazil in them and they are all separate vignettes that while have no connecting threads they have the core of Brazil as their center. The stories all differ from the slightly gritty realistic to the way out and strange. All the stories have a strong undertone of fantasy though. No matter how realistic and easy to relate to the stories start they always veer off into a dreamlike world of possibilities. Like the Twilight Zone, pretty much anything can happen.

Don't expect the artwork from "Umbrella" in here though. The brothers have very similar styles but neither of them are going for that kind of zany/occult story.

I say pick this one up if you don;t mind softer slower art and stories that are more meditative and introspective than straight ahead. (It's more Blankets than Sin City).














kind of a self portrait.
Bá on the front, Fábio with the hat.
(Flickr)

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Bleed Ink---The Umbrella Academy


Howdy Ninjas,

This is my first review of a comic book. I'm going to call it Bleed Ink. It's emo enough to be cool and refreshing comics enough to make sense. I like how the very second blog would be a comic book review.

Today is a review of Gerard Way (writer) and Gabriel Ba's (illustrations) 'The Umbrella Academy' which recently wrapped up it's 6 part mini-series. Most of you may know Gerard as lead singer for My Chemical Romance, but he actually doesn't suck as a writer. I know *gasp*

But hear me out. Most critics agree with me. The comic is good. It's the now usual dysfunctional family with superpowers. A sadistic unfeeling father, Sir Reginald Hargreeves, adopts 8 children born under the same ominous circumstances across the planet and raises them callously to be the saviors of the Earth....from some unknown danger. Too bad that the real and ever present danger is the lack of love from a father to his children. We see the effects of a lifetime of trying to be loved by a distant parent. Hargreeves dies and the residual baggage spills onto the page.

Did I mention Hargreeves is an alien?
Did I mention that the Umbrella Academy of "adult-children" have to save the world?
Did I mention there is a talking simian?

Yes. This comic has strong influences from 'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' in it's use of the occult and coincidental supernatural. Unlike 'Hellboy' which it also reminds me of it doesn't become too convoluted or just plain illogical with it's conspiracies.(I'm the only kid who doesn't like Hellboy, probably). Also, the plot twists happen within the realm of logic but aren't totally predictable. At some points a main character or two is just blasted or jumped upon and it is surprising but not an impossible plot device.

The emotional content drives the heart of the story. I'm very pleasantly surprised by Gerad's consistency and ease of read. He doesn't bore the reader and keeps the pace, page turning. The characters speak like real people and react with real feeling.

The art work by Ba is great and fits the story perfectly. The cover art draws you in and the comic art makes you stay. (If you like this comic look out for Gabriel Ba's and his brother Fabio Moon's blog here:: http://fabioandgabriel.blogspot.com/

also they have the graphic novel De: Tales...it's the shit)

The art is at times clear and at others disjointed and grime, which I guess reflects the universe the characters inhabit.

For a cracked out family, Armageddon, ambiguity about love and if humanity is worth saving, get this series.

Be Aware: Repeated unsettling violence (but not gory) sexual tension, and philosophically unsettling ideas about humanity.


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Now playing: Tokyo Police Club - Nursery Academy
via FoxyTunes

Friday, April 4, 2008

You don't care but I know everything.


This is my first blog in life and let's try to keep it that way for awhile. I've created this little creamsicle of a blog in direct response to Heather F. She's a "crafty" wench if I ever saw one but most would disagree with that.

I plan on reviewing comic books and maybe anime on this thing. Possibly pour my life out and probably do other geeky things. Mostly though I hope to make a great archenemy to Heather's blog.

Also, peep this semi-hard to find/get (for me?) albumn by Dreddie Kreuger doing some hot shit for the Wu. Hottest track being track 9 "ODB tribute". All copyright respect to the Wu. Don't sue me.
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Now playing: GZA & Ras Kass - Lyrical Swords
via FoxyTunes